Saturday, December 31, 2005

seems like my blog's been abandon by me...
i din.
jus too tired and busy to blog.

Christmas's over. been working.
2006 is jus 8 hrs away.
but seems like nothing to me.

i guess only CNY will mean more to me.
coz the date draws nearer.

i have tonnes to catch up on.
there's one report due on 3rd Jan.
wat a stupid date. i have to finish it up soon.
Been skipping MA 2 lectures and tutorials.
i think i'm dead.
left with 2 more mnths before i can say gdbye to TP.
yet i'm exhausted.
really trying hard to push myself.

wonder where's everybody off to celebrate new year.
i'll be doin cleaning tonite.
and duno perhaps... watch WWE wif dear at home...
wash his baby...
jus like how we celebrate christmas,
after work, peacefully sitted at home watching tv...

we went to haw par villa the other day...
took only 2 pics.
so funny.
next mnth we're goin to ZOOOOOO
buy TV...
and after exams, we're goin to HK.
and... i aiming for N92...

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

It's the holiday week now.
but i'm restless.

there's work.
and one damn SIP REPORT
to be submitted by 27th.

I'm stuck wif the same class.
Same group. Same kind of STRESS.
it's not that i dun like this group.
it's jus tat...
i find it hard to keep wif the pace of this group.
and tis class... the damn competitive group.

I nv like to make enemies.
Cept for those wif faces that i can't seem to accept.
I always like to start wif one same rule.
unless, the person seems like a threat to me.
well, that group... definitely does hav one.
who uses that look on me.

I tired.
i wan to work more.
but time doesn't seems to fit in right.
i duno what to do.
I'm HUNGRY now.
but gonna take another nap soon.
hopefully will wake up at 8 and forget about hunger.
am goin to help dear wif cleaning later.

work tml.
think i'll hav to try to do at least 50% of my report tml...
I wish.

Friday, December 16, 2005

Something extremely sad happened a few hours ago.
It affects dear most.
No more FS4459M...
We met up wif a road block.
That's it.
the rest is history.

No more riding.
No more pillion.
and there's most probably a court case coming up.
I duno what to say.
Really Speechless.
I know dear is extremely sad deep inside.
But i really do not know how to comfort him.

I should have stop him.
I can't help but blame myself here and there.
Coz i had that bad feel.
and mum had 'warn' me earlier that something will happen.

there's nothing we can do now.
last 2 pics of our 'baby' before we jus park it downstairs...
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Thursday, December 08, 2005

Ignorance is sometimes the best thing on earth.

One side of me yearns to know the truth.

Yet sometimes,

I rather I not know anything and be an idiot.

At least, I'll be a happy idiot.

It's hard to trust

when it has been broken before.

But yet, it seems like i have not much of a choice.

I have to trust but i duno how to.

I dun think i can afford to lose.

Yet, I have doubts about holding on.

Does the prob really lies with me?

Or is it that the end is near?

I read the blog.

The entry talks about U.

It sounds like the situtaion I'm in.

Seems like,

my sentimentals and my gut has been right.

I certainly do hope that they are wrong.

I wish i could jus care less

Jus like you.

But i can't.

Coz, u jus meant the whole world to me.

but still, i might not mean anything much to u.

I wish i have the power to brainwash myself at times.

I wish my mind doesn't wander off too far.

I wish my curiousity doesn't kill me.

but too bad.

I can't.

many a times i wanted to let go.

but i know deep down inside

i can't bear and afford to.

I guess I have to learn to adapt

and try to be as giving as ever...

even though i'm really tired.


Friday, December 02, 2005

today, after so so so long,
i finally met up with mama!
i really miss hanging out wif mama.
jus like those year 1 and 2 days.
we went to kimage to cut hair.

yuan yuan say it's nice and
this hairstyle suits me better.
so does dear.
maybe, it really does.
thanks to JAI.
the hairdresser.

and, one thing to say,
after cutting hair,
we left funan and mama and i parted,
i saw the hairstylist outside bugis.
even before i reach.

then after cleaning,
dear and i went to 85 to eat.
met up wif his best girl-friend.
and her bf.
after so long.

tml dear and i got off.
we're suppose to watch chicken little
and eat pizza.
then go pet safari...

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Jus came back from dinner with my mum and dear.

simple dinner at the coffeshop
had crab. after so long.
went to the pet farm at pasir ris wif dear.
was lookin at doggies and puppies...

yesterday went to marina sq
and marina bay for dinner wif xp and all.
was a pretty plain and normal day.

wanted to take the river taxi.
coz dear wanted. but we ended up doin something
which i still felt bad.
i jus dun feel like talking.

Friday, November 25, 2005

Happy birthday to ME.
i've got to say gd bye to the 1-0 digits.
hi to 2-0 digits.

thanks effendi
bro, tat was v sweet of u.
thanks mei, i miss u too.
thanks liling. pls take care.
thanks to justin kor. nice dinner.
thanks to cynthia, cheryl and nancy.
thanks big boss.
thanks dear.

i'm damn bored. sighz. duno wat to do.
OT has caused me to be lazy.
coz i'm exhausted.
i dun wan to do anything.
i dun wan to think.
i wish for the hidden wish to come true.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Really v tired.
OT is like endless.
glad that dear's been nice and sweet these two weeks.
forgot to mention that on mon nite
last week
we went mt faber.
and we went singing wif b.x

this wk,
we went marina area on mon.
tues was suppose to be fountain of wealth
but is was down.
so we went back to esplanade area for a while
before heading to mt faber.

i jus hope things will remain as it is...

Saturday, November 12, 2005

haven blogged for a long time.
been really busy.
there's OT everyday nowadays.

thing's pretty peaceful now.
hope it remains as it is.
dear's becumin nicer at times.
hope he's gettin more sensative.

we went to the long promised sentosa - underwater world trip the other day.
though we did had a fight in the morning
things were fine by noon
after i had consulted the stupid doctor.
tension rosed while we were in the Q for consultation at polyclinic.
but still everything cooled.
and we managed to enjoy ourselves.
though missing out the suntan.
maybe few mnths later...
we did took some pics of fishes...
and ourselves of coz...

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Saturday, October 22, 2005

another week has gone by...
i can't bear to post a new post.
the previous post really warmths my heart.
but... things dun always go they way u wan them to be...

it was hard for the past few days.
loggerheads with dear again.
for 3 days straight.
really bad.
thurs was the worse.
damn. THURS again.
i guess it's jinxed.
dear even wanted to move back the very next day.
in the end, he ensured that he WILL move out after new year.
i duno how things are goin to be. i dread the very day.
i've this xtremely heavy stone weighing me down everyday.

everytime i think of the day when he's gonna move back,
i feel extremely sad.
tears will well up automatically.
i'm so troubled.
i jus fear the coming of that very day.
i jus hope that time will stop.
really dun wan to lose him.
so afraid.
i know i can't have him by my side forever.
i know he has to return home one day.
but i jus bring myself to accept the fact that he's leavin me.
i'm hurtin' inside.
really i jus hope to have a happy and simple relationship wif him.
that's my only wish.
i wonder if there's anyone who can help me...
i wan to be the old me...

Thursday, October 13, 2005

haven been bloggin since the last sad post.
things have change slightly for the better.
today is thurs yet again.
everything's still great.

we made up after the quarrel in the late noon.
dear sort of 'forget' everything while i gave in and apologised.
and prepared something for him at nite...

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and that made him repeated his thank yous like nobody's biz.

the rest of the days was work...
until mon, when dear went to get his bike...
and he came down all the way from home (hougang = my place)
to expo to fetch me...

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another angle...

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and i took an 'off-day' on tues.
we went pulau ubin as dear had promise last month.
although we did not camp, we had fun...

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his fren, J.K. posing for a pic after a tiring bicycle ride...

and we saw something interesting...
a dog which dear call 'ah wang' and now i too name it tat,
when to the sea to soak for while.
i guess the weather's too hot...
check the pics out...

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after soaking...

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we went fishin at the damn windy jetty...
u'll understand y...

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jus look at my hair!

and finally, one last pic,
which dear insisted to hav the pulau ubin sign board up there...
jus before we leave...

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Thursday, October 06, 2005

bloggin at expo.
my work place.
feelin v v v v sad.

jus had a tiff with dear again.
it's thurs again.
why is it always thurs.
it hurts alot.

he said he's goin to meet J.K and B.X tonite.
this means that he's gonna be home really late.
it's his off day tml.
wat about me?
i got no off day.
he can go and enjoy all he wan.
hav all the fun he wan.
but i can't
i'm not upset about this.
i'm jus upset that he's goin to be home late
and u know, i wait for him everynite
wait for him to be home before i can slp.
i would try to wait for him.
stay up till he slp.
and we go to bed together.
but i'm really v tired.
there's not much time for me to rest.
i know many of u guys think that it's very silly for me to wait for him
why not jus go and slp first?
i duno.
i jus can't bring myself to slp when he's still outside.
it seems like i can't live w/o him
seems like i've lost my own self again.

everytime we had a fight, i fear
fear of him saying that he wanna move back
coz i can't bear to lose him.
he said he would move back early next year.
i need to prepare myself to get ready for this day to come.
i duno how am i goin to go about doin it.

i feel so stupid. so silly.
why am i like that.
he said that i kept naggin at him.
am i over domineering? i really care for him
very soon he'll be riding a bike. w/o license.
he'd paid deposit for the bike already.
i worry for his safety and all that. 24 - 7
i worry so much so for him. till i becum like that?
i feel like slapping myself awake.
he keeps saying that in the past, before he moved in,
we never quarrel. but now, we often do so.
am i really too dependent on him that i can't live my own life w/o him?
my heart is breaking as i type this post.
i'm silently tearing. to myself.
all i really asked for, is to have a happy relationship wif him.
i dun wan to nag either. it's jus that i wan him to be safe and sound.
i care bare to lose him.
i can't afford to.
i've endured through so many months of waiting.
since jan, feb, the new year, up till now.
i remembered telling myself that if i ever let go this time,
i will never ever turn back.
help. i'm lost.
completely lost. i really dun wan to lose him.
i know for 100% sure, i really do love him.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Finally i get off days after 3 wks of continuous working
straight after the exams.
But it was kinda unexpected.
i din wanted the off.
but my confirmation came a little too late.
tat's why i dun get to work this weekend.
but it's not tat bad either.
at least i can recharge myself tml
that is sun.
coz from mon onwards, it'll be 0730 reporting time
at expo. till wat hours, i dun know.

anyway, went for on-campus session in the morning
and brunch wif the sem 2 groupie.
went to catch a movie wif dear at bugis after his work.
corpse bride. Nice. cute. lovely.
even dear said it's nice.
much better than wat he had expected.
after movie, went to do cleaning together and met up wif J.K.

soon after this i'm gonna hit the sack.
really tired already. Hopefully,
tml can slp for the whole day.
got some house work to do though...
still i must try to catch a gd nap in the noon
for mon's battle. coz dear will be back pretty late.
so, by slping in the noon, it compensates the waiting time lost!
hee... dear's been real exctied about getting his bike lately.
maybe in two weeks time he'll be riding.
hope everything turns out well...

Monday, September 26, 2005

It's been a week plus since my attachment.
Life's pretty much the same there.
reading the stupid manual for a week plus.
but we're moving to expo soon.
i'm feeling tensed.
coz it's gonna be a brand new and huge environmnet.
i'm worried if i can't do well.

so tiring.
ever since dear moved in
i haven really caught a proper wink.
i dun blame him. i'm not pushin the blame to him or anything.
it's jus that my life's so much so different from the past.
it's no longer doing wat i want at whatever time i wan.
and i have tonnes more laundry to do.
an extra person to take care of.
of coz i wan him to be happy tat's why i'm doin all these.
but i somehow feel that i'm overdoin 'em at my own expense.
i dun know if it's really worth it.
i hope so.
no regrets. or rather, i dun allow myself to have any.
dear's gonna get a bike next mnth.
while i'm making him go take his class 2 next mnth.
i dun care. i wan him to have SAFETY FIRST in his mind.
too tired to think what to blog already.
i've got a pile of clothes waiting for me to fold them.
managed to set up dear's desktop for him to use internet as well.
it means, we no longer have to share this laptop.
looking forward to someday to do wiring in my room.
the wires are all over the floor... in a big messssssss.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

I am so slpy.
i wan to slp.
but i dun have much time to slp.
sighz. it's gona be a hlf hr nap?
coz it's alrdy 10+ now.
dear's working + cleaning.
he'll finish soon i guess.
unless he waits for HL.
then he'll reach home near 12.

life's been extremely tiring!
i have not gotten more than 5 hrs of slp
every single day.
i'm surprise that i can still hang on till now.
i'm working everyday.
there's no off day.
i need to do some shopping.
sighz. not for myself.
but for us.

dear's been using 'us' and 'ours' so often.
that it seems like he's lovin' it here.
my mum showed him concern as well.
and whenever he talk about his future,
he talks about my mum and i.
so sweeeeeet of him.
glad that things are better these few days
ever since tat nite when we talked.

i need to get a few pair of boxers for dear.
and get one extra towel for each of us.
buy some shorts for myself (home wear)
get a tv in my room soon.
else this poor darling will have to watch tv
late at nite in the living room alone.
handphones. for us. one each.
and the list nv stops i guess.
and there's one major plan in mind.
shift some furnitures over to my current room!
to put dear's desktop and moi laptop.
and a place to put his clothesssssss.
oh ya, dear's bike.
i've got a deal for him.
maybe he can consider getting it from ah met.
kelvin's fren.
nicceee SP he's got.
but it all revolves ard the same old thing = $

Sunday, September 18, 2005

i back at the downside of my life i guess.
am really unhappy wif dear.
i feel really v v tired.
of many things.
my sip is already a shit
and i hav to take care of him.
i dun mean anything bad here.

i'm jus trying to say that...
why can't he jus be more understanding?
why is it that i'm always the one showing all the care and concern?
when will he treat me like a proper gf?
when will he start to comfort me when i'm down?
will he ever be more sensitive to my feelings?

i'm not asking for too much i swear.
i'm tired of giving.
giving in to him. giving him wat he wants.
always making him happy.
we never fight. before.
but today, i was really really upset with him.
things he said really does affect me a lot.
i din talk to him. all the way back on our way home after HL alighted.
he knows i'm angry with him.
i upset him as well.
i know. coz he had 'sensative nose n eyes' suddenly.
the first time i saw him like tat was during the night
when he had the big fight wif his dad.
today, or rather about half an hour ago,
he had the 'sensitive nose n eyes'
it really hurts me to see him like tat.
i feel bad. but i feel worse inside of me.
about how things are goin.
how unappreciative he has been.
i'm really v v v v sad.
i'm tired.
i feel like giving up again.
but i really do love him.
what can i do?

Thursday, September 15, 2005

i am v v v tired.
v v v stressed.
been attached to pico.
working in the operations department of meeting planners.
it's an events company.
MNC. sighz.
they are having a mega event in oct.
ITMA 2005 at expo. takes up 7. Mind u. 7 halls.
u know wat, we are goin to be expected to
report to expo every morning by 730 during the set up period
tru-out the event till the shut down. that means,
the whole of october.
and the day will only ends at 12mn.
and it's gonna be 7 days.
imagine this: 7 days, from 730 am to 12mn.
working. non-stop. my position: intern.
WTF. how bout my job at takopachi?
i can't giv it up.
i WILL NOT giv it up.
i'm really tired. and stressed.
the boss of operations department SUX.
i hate him. waiping and i are thinkin of speakin to our LO on mon.
wif regards to the damn workin hours.
like wat i said, EXPLOITING MANPOWER!
i rather they kill me.

i can't change company.
stupid sch.
i can't afford to fail SIP.
if i really do, i would rather stop sch.
than waste another year to go through this SIP shit again.
i duno.
lots of tots went tru my mind this whole noon.
quit sch. stop SIP.
it is killing me. SERIOUS.
wat can i do after i quit sch?
work. pursue a degree in SHRI.
or the last resort, get involve wif the government.
serve the nation. haha. signing on wif the navy.
it's been a consideration that has been at the back of my head
since i got my 'O's result till now.
it might be considered as silly, or a moment of rashness.
but who can take it? imagine 7 days a week for one whole month!
the staff can take it bcoz they earn more than we do.
they hav all the benefits i believe.
who gives a shit about those interns?
i'm thinkin. i'm goin to speak to my mum abt this.
if she gives consent, i might jus proceed.

now, i still got to take care of alot of things at home.
coz dear's putting up at my place.
i hav to ya...take care of him.
really really v v v v v tired.

Monday, September 12, 2005

I witnessed an extremely terrifying incident last nite.
it's a long story.
let me jus illustrate.

for the past few days, i was feeling damn upset.
apart from the stress from the exams.
i was also facing the strain from my relationship with dear
due to those flying rumors at work and some other reasons.
although i did not mention my feelings to him, i guess he somehow felt it.
coz the whole of ytd, while we were working,
i din even bother to talk to him properly
din even wanted to look at him.
i was really upset.

at night, when i was on my way home in bus 147
after kelvin alighted, dear called.
i was surprised. coz i was actually preparing myself
for the thought of ending this relationship.
he asked me to wait for him at his area
and to stay over at his place.

so i waited for him.
went up his place.
after bathing, his parents came back.
that was when the incident started.
i swear i din know that his step-mom was unhappy
with the fact that i'm using their 'facilities'
i'm refering to bathing and using dear's com.
if i had knew it i wouldn't had used. AT ALL.

she started grumbling and nagging.
then dear lost his cool. he started yelling back.
and they started the fight.
dear's father tried to stop. but then his step-mom refused to stop.
and dear threw his half-eaten rice on the flow (he literally flung the chair)
of coz i was shocked. and speechless.
i was told to go home. ok i changed and was about to leave
and things got worse.
dear refused to clean up the messed he made and his parents were still scolding him.
and dear sent me out of the house. and i realised i left my watch in his room.
he went back to retreive it together with all his savings (coins)
and things got worse. i din really know wat happened
coz i was outside his house, at the corridor.
dear starting throwing things.
he flunged 2 glass materials. wat, i do not know.
he came out. and suddenly got very mad and went back in again.
this time round, he took the big vase. i mean BIG.
and smashed it. i tried to stop him but of coz i failed to.
i was really scared stiff.
his sis was crying for him to stop.
his dad called the police coz he almost flung the smashed glass pieces at his step-mom.
scared stiff.
i really was.
we left soon. his hand was bleeding due to the glass pieces.
i went to 7-11 and bought some medication for him.
i was trembling when i was making payment.
i could see my hand shaking. it was horrible.
i felt real bad. i brought dear back home.
and i suppose he'll be staying at my place.
but he's not around now.
he went back to get his stuff.
i duno if he's able to come back. i'm worried for him.

and guess wat, my internship's starting this wed.
i'm in an events company.
sighz. i'm working 7 days a week from today onwards.
wish my luck.

Friday, September 09, 2005

finally, the exams are over.
and my really short term holiday shall begin
from the very min i finished my last paper at 1545.
the paper was supposed to end at 1630.
as usual, i like to finish it fast and *PooF*

back at home.
received a call from sch jus now.
got a news regarding my attachment.
guess wat, i'm going back sch on mon
for a briefing? din really catch wat the woman was saying.
all i know is that... i'll be starting my SIP earlier.
coz the company wans me to start earlier.
there goes my 2 wks of working at takopachi.
that means, i can't work there wif dear anymore.
no more helping him after work wif cleaning.
only if he works on sunday.
i wonder will my SIP end early as well?
coz i start early!
it's only fair. else they better pay me!

i miss dear a lot.
haven seen him for not say v long.
jus a few days.
can't blame it.
coz we work at the same place.
always work together. but i had 5 days off due to exams.
tml, i'm takin his shift coz aunty's giving him off for workin 5 days straight.
sighz. and sunday, he's takin the early shift while for me,
it's as usual.
but he's staying to do cleaning.
duno y jus feel like sighing.

good thing tat my exams are over.
i can really REST.
heave a sigh of RELIEF.
din catch enough slp for the whole of last week.
it's time for RESTORATION.

Saturday, September 03, 2005

feel so tired.
been working for the past 2 days.
my study week had gone into the drain.
din really study much.
i guess i really got to whip my ass later.
study SIT first then mug MA.
else monday i shall hav a white flag.
i can't afford to fail MA.
it's not really that difficult really rite?
not like BA 1 and 2 with all the shitty ledger accounts.

went 'fishing' the other day with dear and his fren,
J.K and his gf.
went to lower pierce reservior.
Lots of monkeys!
tryin to catch those mini lobsters for rearing.
so hard to catch.
fished for whole noon.
only got one catch.
loads of wildlife insects there.

look at the dejected face of the fisher with his gf in another world....

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a pic of dear taken by me...
he calls it a L.J(bad word) face...

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last but not least, the one and only catch of the day...

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oh ya, takopachi has officially increased price from 2 bucks to $2.20.
with effect from 1st sept.
and damn the lady who gave me $50.50.
it's irritating. dun giv ppl trouble!
it's alrdy hard to count $$$
and i still need to serve fast!

i better stop. and start studying.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

stressed out.
exams coming.
can't seem to study.

ytd was a looong day.
went to sch in the morning.
went to meet anderson, kel, chui yee, soo peng and wei zhen
for dinner at marina bay in the evening.
'takopachi-bugis-youngsters' gathering?
nah... the 3 guys are OLD.
got scare by a prawn.
the prawns there are so fresh, that they are alive.
and are put in a tupperware.
irritating kelvin went to poke at one of it
jus bcoz i said they dun seems to be moving.
and guess wat?
one of it jumped out.
on the table. i almost screamed.
had fun during dinner.
after that we went to the arcade for some games.
and left at 9 plus.

went to dear's place late nite ard 2345.
we went mustafa again.
saw this phone nokia 6101.
dear quite like it.
as if wan buy together.
i get the white, he get the black.
even if he does, it'll be few months down the road.
his 800 bucks SP (bike) target is his main aim now.

ytd, we had a 'fun' time together in his room,
try to catch a hornet.
he calls it a bee.
wait, not one. but 2!
he caught one without any difficulties.
the second took him a long time.
disturbing. first time see him so disturbed.
by an INSECT.
tried to study events management at his place.
but the hornets are attracted to the lights.
i wonder why.
so can't study. plus, i kept doozing off.
slpt at ard 6 in the morning.

am so tired.
waiting for dear to reach home.
he called to say that he's going for dinner
or rather, supper wif H.L.
am supposed to be studying.
as usual...

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

am a little bored.
so did this quiz:

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

quite accurate here and there.

Monday, August 22, 2005

i am soooo tired.
back from work.
my feet aches. duno y.
still gotta do HRD paper later.

today's first day of work for dear.
first time we worked together at the same shop.
he got rank C1! ok la. he deserved it.
coz he used to work at taka.
even lady boss knows him. bad name. haha.
anyway, i tot his skill is still commendable.
good effort. good behavior. haha...
tml is yet, another day for him.

as for myself, tml is a darn long day. = (
i swear i HATE tuesdays. lesson starts from 10.
ends at 6. with both events management lecture and tutorial
one after another STRAIGHT.
Gosh. Tiring.
today, i saw Na* dearie at the bridge!
goodness! i really haven seen her for the longest of G5.
really miss her.
btw, i wonder if Na*'s blog is down or i have some stupid brain
that doesn't knows how to navigate my way through.
Haha. coz that's wat happened to chriss's blog...

i'm missing Nisey too... and Zhen as well...
Duno when will we see each other again... = (
it's been ages since we all met up and head town!
u know, shopping... but always window shop for me.
Oh yeah, *MaMa*! i WANA cut hair! i'm waiting for u!!!!!!

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

decided to come and blog about the past few days.
i wasn't in the mood to blog.
was more of like running away.
even though all projects submissions were over.

acc dear to interview the other day at shangri la.
he got the job. it was through referral.
we woke up at 1 when he was suppose to go for the interview at 2 plus.
couldn't find a proper shirt to wear.
thank gdness i wore the top dear gave me.
so we 'xchanged'
i wore his 'can't make it' t shirt and he wore the polo tee.
so funny on the thought of that.

but this silly boy, on second thoughts, decided not to work there.
a very last min decision.
now, he's waiting for employment at takopachi.
ya... my work place.
hopefully aunty grant him a vacancy.
then he'll be the cook cum cleaner at our shop.
dear jus told me he really wanted to get that bike from B.X
800 bucks. wonder where can he dig out money.

anyway, was feeling super down ytd.
i think i suffered a broke-down or depression.
i was super irritated in the evening.
and super depressed at nite.
good thing i'm okay now.
oh... bernie and wai ping have been commenting about me.
they said i lost quite some weight.
but they see me everyday.
i wonder how they tell.
they kept saying i took tat xtrim product endorsed my zoe tay.
and kept goin "cha-cha-cha"
that made me laugh like mad.
even anderson also said so.
if this carries on, maybe soon, i will lose a great deal of weight.
that's something really worth celebrating for.
was jus talkin to mama and shan about my weight loss plan the other day
at jean's birthday chalet.
we ended up lookin for 'samples' of me before and after.
i dun mind lookin like the girl in the purple racer back top
in the next unit.


Monday, August 15, 2005

i got nothing to blog about.
same old thing.
v v v tired.
need lotsa lotsa rest.
miss dear lots lots.

Friday, August 12, 2005

Finally! it's fri tml!
3 projects submission and left wif P&C
tat is, performance and compensation.
i keep thinkin that the deadline is on next fri.
but in fact, it's this coming mon.
Omg. tml goin to do project whole day i hope.
really hope to finish by tml so that sat dun hav to go back.
i really dun wan to go back sch on sat!
i need to slp.
i haven been slping!
work has been tiring.
i'm so tired that i almost fell aslp while working for the past 2 days.
today i help dear wif his cleaning.
coz this boy was still slping when i called him at 945.
we finished work at ard 11 then we walked to take 147 together.
btw, dear haven gotten his pink ic yet. = (
maybe tml or mon... hee... then it's really
gdbye to sembawang airbase!

Monday, August 08, 2005

i feel like running away. i'm having split personality.
i'm lost.
i think i'm goin to break down soon
if i can't get over this fri.
the projects are stressing me up.
i duno how to work wif ppl anymore
i jus wan to do it ON MY OWN.
but i'm so tired.
i dun have time.
i really can't take it anymore.
i can't sleep later.
coz i got to do some shit. (sch work)
tml, i'm goin to see my group.
i duno wat to tell waiping.
i'm avoiding her.
coz i really duno wat to do.
seem's like we can't do projects together.
i'm afraid to think who is goin on the wrong track.
i duno. i am muTha-FuKin confused.
screw it.

one the other hand, i'm a happy girl wif dear ard.
met dear on fri nite. but we din go to extend his pdl on sat.
coz tat lazy bummy wana play game.
i am happy tat dear trust me somehow.
though i tried to hint to him something about J.K
but then he too trust him.
i duno if i shld jus tell him the truth.
but the gd thing is that...
dear believe i wun go over.
and yes. i WILL NEVER go.
i duno whether plans for this thurs will carry on
coz dear hasn't confirm whether will he get the bike.
btw, he's riding w/o a license.
i'm tired. v tired. i feel like slpin.
but i can't. tml i'm workin.
so is tues.
i duno how to face my project grp...

Friday, August 05, 2005

in the sch free asccess lab now.
doing SIT report. stupid report.
stupid LKK. the report is EXCEEDING!!!!!
slpt at 1+ last nite, work up at 5am to complete my part
reached sch at ard 9.20.
so tiring.

ytd too. slpt pretty little.
slpt at 3+ and woke up at 8+ coz dear called.
he overslept. went to meet him at ard 12.20.
laze ard till 3.15 then went to work.
work was tiring even though there was little customer.
why? coz i was DAMN TIRED.
i need slp!
now in lab hoping tat the stupid SIT can finish ASAP.
i wana go home!
meeting dear tonite.
tml morning goin to drivin centre wif him to extend his PDL for class 2.
lookin forward... = )

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

i'm floating somehow...
so happy.
dear's gona ORD next thurs when both of us tot it was next next mon.
anyway, we have been talkin more nowadays...
he told me next thurs he's goin to fetch me to and fro
sch. and send me home and to work as well.
i hope so...
hope. really. hope.
lookin forward to next thurs.

back to reality...
i have tonnes of work to be done for my project.
but i can't bring myself to do it!
i'm like a total free rider now.
i think i have to start something soon...
stressful school life.

Sunday, July 31, 2005

i am so slpy.
i am goin to slp real soon.

i have a love-hate relationship with my intuition.
anyway, it was half right.
ytd, i met up wif dear.
supposed to be over at his place tonight too.
but something cropped up. his case. not me.

leaves me wondering wat's goin on now...

Friday, July 29, 2005

have been on the phone with dear these few days.
and ytd nite, i went over.
he said tonite, and tml nite too.
but then... i have a bad feeling.
i keep feelin tat tonite will be called off.
i duno. am i too paranoid? or wat?
i duno. really duno.

anyway, i had a bad day ytd.
was pretty fed up.
wasn't myself.
and i fell down at the steps near the atm towards the bridge.
so embarassing!
now i got one patch of blue black on my leg.
i'm workin... tml, sun, and mon.
i think i'm gona die...

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

jus off the phone from talkin to dear.
he's been callin me these few days to talk.
really a good thing to look forward to.
oh ya, dear went to pull out his wisdom tooth today.
Ouch. i dun even dare to pluck mine.
after all, i have to pay a huge sum for them
whereas, he pays $0.
why? NS guy.
good right?!
mc for 5 days.
next wk he's goin for another one.
another 7 days mc.
then it'll be bye bye! to NS.

went to geylang serai today for SIT project.
SIT = Special Interest Tourism.
fri have to go Kampung Glam.
haiz. been spending $$ on muesum
waste money. somemore no reimbursment!
i curse that damn LKK.
stupid module.

Monday, July 25, 2005

i am back.
ok i din really went away for a long time
was jus fully offline for 1 and a half day.
anyway, i shall not elaborate wat i did this wkend.
was pretty pissed of with ppl.
ppl, who treat my existence with no respect.
but still i kept coooooool. really cooooooooooool.
i NEVER talked at all to those ppl.

one good thing to mention...
even though i din get to see my dear this wkend,
he actually called me for 2 days. jus to talk to me.
with was quite unexpected. of coz, i was ELATED.
even till now.
esp on sat nite... we talked... for 2hrs plus near 3 hrs.
we only talked a little today. coz he did called me earlier b4 he went to work.
but i din hear my phone. so there was 3 missed calls.
i jus hope this will go on...
at least now, there's more communication goin on...

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

i wan to blog.
but i duno wat to blog about.
was reading my previous posts.
i always refer him as a he or jus him.
i wonder does my readers know who exactly is this fella?
lol. apart from mama... and those who are regularly updated
about my life in real life, i guess, it's jus a HIM
to everyone else.

maybe i shld make it clear...
this him, is ah xiong.
the cleaner at my work place, who asked me to 'marry' him
about half a year ago.
initially, i tot he was jus foolin ard and jokin.
but he was serious then. so yes, we were and are together.
however, it was pretty on-off.
it was until late april when we got back together,
there wasn't any off YET till now.

coming to think about it seriously, i have no confidence STILL
in this relationship.
it's too independent. it's like living life as each day passes by.
not daring to think or have any hopes. jus takin it really easy.
i know i WILL get hurt. for sure.
but i'm still willin to risk it. wif big thanks to him
for being able to make me fall for him, from a like to a love.
sometimes, i talked a lot about how i spent my day with him
for one simple reason. i wan it to be a beautiful memory.
with one same fear of losing him.
i remebered that when i lost him durin the first 2 break ups,
i often dream of him... well... is this wat they call real love?
sometimes i wonder, am i stupid or am i naive.
to believe or make myself believe that he loves me a lot.
due to the persistance he showed.
i guess his existence does matters a lot to me
after all tat i've done for the past few months.
i really have to admit... i have fallen real deep shit in love
with this darling of mine.
he might not me really nice to me.
not really playin the role of a typical bf. but love is blind.
i'm still willing to give.
for how long? i really have no idea.
perhaps... until the day, when i give up, which is something,
i have been refraining myself from.
maybe that day will never come? or will it?
i duno. nobody knows.
only fate, something i believe in, will know.
and only time will tell.

anyway... i also duno y am i talkin about all these.
any link to any stuff?
readers may get confuse.
but this is the time yet again,
i'm jus sayin how i feel.
i've been lying low wif regards to tis relationship.
tat's y i need to let it out after so many months.
k... this post is gettin v personal.
i guess i shall stop here.
i miss him though.

Monday, July 18, 2005

today, i almost almost.
BLEW my top. wif my project grp.
so pissed.
see... the stupid fact of 6 ppl to submit 1 damn report is already
STUPID. wat's more, reachin at 830?
and the worse thing is... i spent 15 bucks to reach school!
i am alrdy on the verge of bankruptcy after such a long time.
and i still spent 15 bucks?!?! wtf.
and when i was at the entrance of the sch, they told me they submit the report alrd.
oh well... wat's the point of meeting then?!?!?
i know i was late but it was like 845. there's still 15 mins to 9.
wat's the hurry? and then they told me they're goin opp sch to eat.
OH FUCK IT. i was damn pissed.
i turn them down straight. NO. I AM NOT GOING OVER.
thank goodness... my dearest mama came sch early enough...
i love u mama!!!!! haha...
i really do! haha....

Sunday, July 17, 2005

i haven been bloggin..
actually i did. the other day.
but something was wrong wif blogger.
so the post din came out.
i wasn't bothered either.

the past week was really tedious despite the fact that
i was havin my one wk break after mid-sem test.
i worked for 4 days. including today.
had project discussions EVERYDAY. except today.
wow. my whole week was GONE.
i din hav a gd chance to rest.
instead i got more tired.
i really wish this sem to END soon.
SIP comes. 11 wks will FLY by. and then the LAST sem of my 3 yrs in TP.
but will i survive tat long?
will i be able to take it?
i duno.

i went singing on fri nite after work wif anderson, kel, ace, hongling and ah beng.
he refuse to go. saying he was not happy wif anderson.
duno y. we sang till 3... i slpt at 4 plus.
and woke up at 8, havin to meet my project grp at 830.
WOW. i got home in the late noon.
took a nap at 9 plus. after feeling super sad.
duno y.
i set an alarm at 2345 to wake myself up.
and at 0000, he called me...
reached his place at 1. slpt at 2? i suppose.
woke up at 12 or something.
this boy, keeps waking up. i duno wat hour he woke up once.
askin if i wan water and then he went to watch tv.
came back and slp. till 10 plus he woke up to play game.
huh. guess i was super tired tat's y i kept slping.
i mean the 3 plus hrs of slpt on sat all tat...
tml, got to meet them at 830 again.
i feel so silly. y? coz 6 ppl... meeting to submit one report...
tired... really tired.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

i am so like not tired.
u know... my whole week is PACKED.
there's totally like no break...
projects from mon to fri.
maybe sat.
work for four days. how gd is tat... huh.
i'm so slpy.
everyday make myself dead beat b4 i slp.
tat makes me suffer.
insufficient slp.

went for field trip today.
after tat went to meet kel.
walk ard orchard while on the phone wif him.
haha. poor kel... like walkin alone. and was holding my cds for me.
we were merely walking ard orchard.
there's like a thousand and one things i feel like buying
but i know i dun have enough to spend.
i have yet to buy my contact lens yet. i must get them first
before buyin the tv.

yawnz... time to sleep...
another field trip tml...

Sunday, July 10, 2005

happy or sad?
like i was telling effendi.
i am happy for the way things are goin now.
but i am sad. for that he haven really plan properly.

i am slpy.
duno y. slpt alot or so i tot...
ytd, after he called, went to meet him wif his
long awaited chicken rice.
haven seen him for ard 2 wks.
he LOST weight. is officially BOTAK now.
and is TANNED. he got a V shaped tanned ard his neck.
he's gained muscles. (on the arms)

he told me... how horrible it was inside.
the food esp. no wonder he kept eating the whole of ytd.
stayed over at his place.
he woke up early today. due to the construction noise.
i managed to half slp tru it.
he went to buy breakfast when i woke up. and watched tv together.
slpt at ard 3 and woke up at 9 plus at nite.

how sad. he asked if i wan to go home.
i said i hav no choice. coz my uniform is at home.
and i am workin tml.
i was really surprise when u said the 3 words.
tat's y i replied wif a HUH. and u said again.
and i said i can't hear. made u said it 3 times.
i really hope it's true...

Friday, July 08, 2005

HE IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i wana announce to the whole world!
HE IS BACK!!!!!!!
hahaha... so happy for him.

he called me while i was on my way home!
he called me... HE IS BACK!

hahahaha... goin to meet him later...

HE IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tml is the final final final mid sem paper!
or rather in 9 hrs time!
oh... tat means, i will be slpin for less than 9 hrs!
less than 8! abt 6 plus.
Awwwwww... insufficient slp!

went to starbucks to study before goin to work today.
those regular 'la-kopi' khakis will know tat i DUN drink coffee.
i always order the same few drinks.
so i ordered my ice coco. and guess wat.
this guy next to me ask the counter girl:
'wat's that? Milo Dinosaur?

i duno how shld i react. after a few secs, i turn to look at him.
i took my stuff and sat down.
started studying.
went to work.
lai yuan yuan asked me whether wan to go sing song tml nite.
tml need to go bugis get cleaner pay from aunty loh.
NO $$ already.
got my pay cheque today. so little $$$. coz i was late twice last month.
so total deduction of half hr pay. haiz.

hope my HRD will be fine...
tired tired.
1 last day...

Thursday, July 07, 2005

feeling slpy.
had M.A today...
i think i would JUST PASS.
made a lot of mistake i believe.
u know i dun have the habit of checkin my notes after papers.
i mean... wat's the point. u already submitted it! so... NOT BOTHERED.

havin my last paper, HRD on fri.
HRD = human resource development.
haiz... haven studied yet.
tot i wanted to mug once i reached home.
who knows i ended up spendin on entertainment.
i forgot my fri paper is on an EARLY MORNING 9am.
and i have to work tml. which means,
i got NO TIME to study.
i better whip my ass tml morning to study.
i have to becum sadist to make myself study...
Urghz... scary? i got a lot of scratch marks earlier...
only if i have those pics... u wld have tot i was abused.
anyway, if u dun understand wat i am talkin, nvm the shit.

btw, i am learning 3 songs now... haha... 1 of it is for future ktv sessions.
2 of them are from initial d the movie. i doubt they hav the song yet.
the one song... 楼下那个女人 by 游鸿明 is so bloody hard to sing.
haha. but i love it. it's nice...

2 more daysssss.....

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

i am re-doing my M.A tutorial.
M.A = Managerial Accounting.
LOL. i hate numbers.
i hate accounts.
i'm having my M.A test tml. ok now i know.
my HRD test is on fri 9 am!
shit man. i like got so much time to study for my hrd huh?
i'm working on thurs! SHIT.
weird. i'm not really stressed up by these upcoming tests.
i dun think i'm confident enough. all i know is tat...
i need UNDERSTANDING... as for HRD... hmmm... duno la..
i'm finishing my M.A soon. left with 2 qns. so tired to continue.
the stupid clock qns got me stuck for a long while.
hopefully tml's paper's easier...

back to 'mugging'

3 more days.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

my my.... bones are cracking
i NEED a full body MASSAGE!!!
haha... really tired.
these two days, the crowd at bugis is like never ending!
i mean... it's as though u're getting FREE FOOD?
ppl come and go... but it jus doesn't seems to end there?!
ya... loads of ppl.
and faced pretty few spoilt bitches today.
i mean kids nowadays.
pls stop being ignorant.
and the food i'm selling is NOT FUNNY.
stop laughing at it. if u think it is, why on earth are u eating it?
stupid girls.
lol. i'm not angry. i jus wana scold them u know.
i feel like slappin them in fact.
blame it on the fact that today is youth day.
where the kids i call them KIDS. not youth.
come to bugis like nobody's biz.

oh yeah, papa and mama came to bugis today!
haha... my papa wanted to eat according to mama.
ps: pls do not mistake the mama i'm refering here as min.
anywayz, u guys look great together! and i miss u guys.
i mean u evil papa so long never see u
and u never come online. din even know mama was back in sg.
lol. it's nice seeing ppl u haven seen for ages. RITE? G5... LOL.

k... i'm getting prretty shitty here.
wat? why? i duno.
i'm havin M.A test on wed. or is it HRD? omg.
wat a great student. i dun even know which paper comes first.
lol. i gotta start studying tml. i MUST.
suddenly feel like playin sims 2... hmm... we'll see abt tat...
i was thinkin a little tad too much in the noon.
i was thinking about wat xp had told me few days back wif regards to my current relationship.
i duno... i think i should take one step at a time?
grrr... i duno! i really duno... all i know is...
4 more days...

Monday, July 04, 2005

having a bad headache.
duno y.
everytime i clean the fridge while working
i get this damn headache.
and it's BAD.
it's still affecting me now.

mid sem test wk
i haven study a single bit
yes it is.
very tired.

miss him lots.
as usual.
5 more days.

Sunday, July 03, 2005

i'm sleepy...
after bloggin ytd, i went to slp for like 2 hrs.
before waking up.
went to CCK cemetery to pay respect to my late grandmother.
and my grandfather as well.
...sad... miss my grandma dearly...

bro sent me home at ard 2 plus i suppose.
slpt at 3 plus... and woke up at 11 plus...
from a phone call... WRONG NUMBER.
i could hav slpt past the nite. DAMN U.
decided to come online to do the regulars before goin back to slp.
hell. who knows wat's wrong now.
i'm facing slow transfer rate of a zip file.
yawnz. tired. been sneezing today...
wat's wrong?
the moment i woke up, i sneezed...
oh... i realized! i only ate a plate of rice and one small bread for the whole day.
coz i slpt my day away..... grrrrrreat...


Saturday, July 02, 2005

jus got home not too long ago.
went to catch initial d AGAIN.
it's keke's bday.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY my dear fren.
glad to see u in a happy relationship now.

anywayz, wasn't very pleased today.
actually, everything started well.
then when i met up wif kel to acc me for the movie,
i tot i made a stupid mistake.
i could have gone w/o him
i would rather be alone.
it's not tat he was mean to my frenz or wat.
jus tat, i tot it's not quite rite
to call him a spare. alrite.
i din wanted to go to the movie with 4 couples and left alone.
i'd felt damn left out.
that's y i got myself a fren. not a spare.
i'm ok with those jokes.
but i din expect this fella to be kinda anti social this much today.
esp when u went 'M.I.A' when we're ready to go.
i felt like a fool.
oh well. an idiot. i'm feelin horrible now.
i duno if what i did was rite.
xp, if u're reading this, dun get me wrong.
i'm not angry with u for poking fun at him.
i swear that i'm alrite with it.
i jus tot that... i'm being put in a spot.
pls dun get me wrong ok. i'll be fine.
we're still frenz. forever. for life.

is it the time? or wat?
i'm feelin so down now.
listening to the soundtrack from initial d, Yi Lu Xiang Bei.
feel like giving up something.
but wat?
i'm tired.
i miss him alot.
it's already past 12. so... it's 7 more days...

Thursday, June 30, 2005

i realised i have been spending quite alot lately
esp on indulgence.
lotsa nice food.
coffee club weekly for 2 wks
and i always give my frenz treat.
swensens today.
Oh... i swear i MUST mention the service i got today.

See, shifu and i went to swensens bugis for brunch.
we ordered baked rice. chicken and fish.
if u know me well enugh, u'll know i eat FISH.
when we were served, the server herself asked
"chicken baked rice?" so i pointed to my fren.
and she served the 'fish baked rice to me.
after a few bites, i stared at the 'fish' on my rice
they DUN look fish to me.
being a fish lover... how can i not know how fish meat look like?!!
so i asked the waiter. and he said that shifu has gotten the fish baked rice.
oh well... his attitude SUCKS big time.
anyway, disappointed, i continued eating the 'fish' baked rice.
and i saw some plastic thingy inside!
i asked for the service crew.
and this lady attended to me... she was at least better then the guy.
but after she checked, she told me it's not plastic. it's sum strings from the rice bag.
i'm like... ok.. fine... i dun wan a new serving anymore.
What's the point of tellin me wat's that? i mean it's inedible anyway?!
ok i know u wanted to explain but then, it makes no difference.
it's not like my shop... those bloody damn fish flakes being mistaken for onion skins or watever shit.
anyway, i have to say that the baked rice tasted horrible.
i mean... it's not the usual cheesey baked rice u eat from swensens.
it's SUPER tasteless! YUCKS!
thank goodness i still have my sticky chewy chocolate to indulge in.
the last thing i tot is worth of my stay in swensens.
oh.. at least they bother to cancel my order and not charge me for that
'plastic-fish baked rice'. LOL.

anywayz, after that, shifu and i went to shop around.
and i bought 2 tops...
and i tot... i should have bought one for him
that's something that i've always wanted to do...
buy him a top. i duno y. but i always wanted to...
yawnz... it's been a long post.
there's more to update tml. another LONG DAY.

counting down... freedom from DB. 9 days...

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

i feel a little lost.
you're now inside db.
in for 10 days.
i'm happy that it's jus 10 freaking days.
but i duno how's life in there for you.
i'm worried for u.
i really wonder why i care so much for you.
i'm glad that u informed me about this before u go.
i jus hope that what u told anderson will be true.
i duno if i'm the one.
but then, i jus wan to see u well..
these 10 days, hopefully, will fly by soon.
hope that they wun make things difficult for u inside.
missing you...always.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

initially, i wanted to bring myself to let u go.
but you actually bothered to ask y
y am i so angry.
and the three words u typed in msn.
and having see you again ytd
your smile and ur jokes...
made me laughed.

but... this very afternoon,
u called me and told me that u are goin to db.
which means, they are charging you for AWOL.
and u're definitely goin in.
and i will not be able to see u again soon.
i duno how long will u be away.
u said that if it was light, 40 days. else, it could be 80 days.
i'm so confused.
i duno what to say....

Saturday, June 25, 2005

i feel miserable
not bcoz i'm sick.
yes i am sick
sick of waiting.

i remembered you called me on wed to ask me out today.
but then...
i'd spent the whole day at home
watching vcds. trying to take my mind off.
i decided to stop watching.
and time spent wholly on waiting for the damn phone to ring
is jus like waiting for the whole of my life to pass by.
you told me that you will call me in the noon.

i'm still waiting.
how late am i suppose to wait?
tired. really tired of waiting.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

so sick
ouch. my knee hurts.
i duno why.
my eyes HURTS even more when i touch them.
i had a hard time slping last nite.

the doc told me ytd that if my fever doesn't subside
in two days, i have to see him again.
he was thinking of dengue fever when he told me this.
let's jus wait and see.

ytd u called me and was really trying to be funny.
surprise surprise that u actually called me jus to talk...
even ask for opinion about the 3 hps u liked.
anywayz, nice polo t of ur's.
i think u really look GREAT in it...
but wat a waste to wear it to work...

Sunday, June 19, 2005

hot... my body is hot
my palms are freakin cold.
my throat is BURNING...
my head weighs a tonne.
yeah rite.
i am sick.

oh.. happy belated 19th birthday
to our dear 'si-mei' aka shan shan aka weishan!!!
we celebrated at chinablack.
my first visit there.
and i'm sick now.
lol. what does that mean?

am pretty surprised and glad that
u chatted wif me for 1 hr plus online ytd.
the usual u wun bother to do so...
and even more happier that u actually called me
jus to tell me that you are goin to collect your phone.
i appreciate the effort u took...
oh well, ppl may think tat it's jus a call
but then, your call means more than anything.... alrite...
i wonder is it that the talk u had wif anderson working??

Sunday, June 12, 2005

had a long day?
it all started from ytd.
i woke up in the noon.
but went to meet my trio bros.
namely, effendi and asri.
for pool... well, it's been a long time.
i love it guys.

reached home at ard 1 am.
as usual, online...
at abt 2 am, u msged me in gb.
askin me if i was free...
and practically told me tat u forgot...
FORGOT... to ask me over.
how can u ever forget such things?
well, anyway, i went over and meet u ard 2.45?
watched a little of initial d (anime)of coz.
went to slp at duno wat god damn hour.
early morning 9 am plus,
the construction work downstairs gave me the stupid morning call.
but managed to catch up another 2 hrs plus of slp.
b4 i really woke up.
went to work from ur place... damn, it was so much faster.
of coz! ur place is like so easy to go everywhere!
takes less then half hr to reach sch too!

anyway, today, i look the shabbiest!
my uniform was ultimately crumpled.
thanks to u... for the last min meeting...
leave me wif no time to iron my uniform.
and... today, i was allowed to cook ball ball!!!
YEAH!! i am so happy.
aunty actually asked me if i wld like to learn!
and i asked if i really could.
and she let me tried 2 plates!!!
so happy.
it's not easy! i still can't get the '7 o'clock' angle thingy
and hold my left hand...
hopefully i get more chances.. as i heard aunty saying
she wants to train me to cook ball ball!!!

ok... too long a post.
i better go do my M.A tutorial.

Friday, June 10, 2005

i went out today....
my feet aches from those walkin
but nothing hurts
as much as
my heart does.

i bought a ring...
which i really like though.
the word on it is kinda kinky
or cool...
u define it...
like wat nisey says.
as long as i like it!

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Wednesday, June 08, 2005

haven heard from u these 2 days.
duno how's things.
i dun wan to guess either
i'm not workin tml.
so i wun know..
coz i wun be seeing you anyway.

hope to hear from you on fri
jus like last week?
i duno...
everytime i hope...
i fall...

a pic of u cropped out.... cutting out H.L. sorry!
the ktv nite...

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Saturday, June 04, 2005

back home..
freshen up by a nice bath.

was out last nite.

you called me at 9+ and 10+
so met up and went over to meet u
enjoyed the moment...
the real playful u
played game.
went to mustafa at 2+ am to buy your optical mouse, which i still think it looks like an alien...,
milk... and chocolate... and had 'mum-mum'
walked back...
bathed, slpt, woke up at 2...
went for 'brunch'
slack ard... till 6 b4 i head back home...
can i say it's quality time spent?
i duno. anyway, i left my toothbrush at your place...
hope u keep it properly...

deepest condolences to j.y's grandmother
who passed away last nite...

Wednesday, June 01, 2005


something's wrong wif my X70.
either that or the batt.
ppl have to call me TWICE...

i hate this.
esp when u dun call me all the time
and now ur hp is down.
F-up. u called me 3 times.
and 2 out of which u had to call back again.
tat makes it a total of 5 calls.
except for the last on which my phone died on... again
read tat! AGAIN!!!
few mins back.
you have yet to call back.
guess... you're goin home?
hope to hear from you tml...
i'm sorry. din expect that.

but i do appreciate that u call...
miss you.

Sunday, May 29, 2005

anything new?



first came the throat inflamation.
then down to cough.
then now, runny nose + nose block.
oh... wat's next?
FEVER?? coool... i dun mind.
it gives me excuse to rest myself more.

went singing despite my sore voice.
yes yes.. super went off key like nobody's biz.
NEVER am i goin to sing again when i have a throat like this.
after tat, went yes, yes, shopping again.
spent ard 100 bucks?
on shoes and bag.

no more spending!
somebody tie me up pls!!!!

Wednesday, May 25, 2005


haven not slpt enugh for the past 2 nights.
having u callin early morning at 9+
and having spending last nite over.
gives me 100% transformation :


esp last nite.
tossing and turning. can't sleep.
though it was raining. but the construction work
upgrading all tat happening in the early morning...
so hard to get sleep.

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took the pic b4 while slping... wonder how long will we be holding on...

there's no school tml.
finally can catch more slp...
i hope so? i duno.
it's a gd thing i get slp.
but if i din get ur call...
it's disturbing.

Sunday, May 22, 2005


very tired.

had a superly long day.
and havin slpt at 3+ last nite doesn't help a single bit.

wasn't working today.
coz i WORKED yesterday.
woke up early
went for K lunch wif special guest,
ANDERSON LAI aka yuan yuan.
after singing, spent the rest of the day SHOPPING!

i spent quite a lot today.
100 over bucks. 'Kaaa-chhiiiinnng'
one new top, skirt, 'shoes', bag, toiletries.

feeling slpy.
working tml.
and then, sch starts.

Saturday, May 21, 2005

glad u called me ytd and today.
watever it is
nice to hear from u

time to slp.
there's a long day tml.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

i duno wat u wan...
u've been callin for the past 2 days.
not sure if you'll call tml?

are we or are we not...
only u will know.

i'm goin to not think about it anymore.
leave it as it is.
i'm not goin to be the one clearing up
nor am i the one who messed it up.
i'll jus see wat u do.

hopefully find out more from your friend, J.K.

Monday, May 16, 2005

physically. mentally. emotionally.
been tru a tough emotional roller coaster ride.
too tired to think.

i'm caught up.
it's juz like jolin's song
dao dai.
i really had enough of waiting.
a constantly off-on relationship
which had already dragged on for 4 mnths.
really leaves me drained.
plus, my grandma's death, which,
had a huge impact on me.

these few days
u really do annoy me alot.
i do not know why am i so irritable.
putting a stop to everything
is the only thing on my mind now.

star gazing // fire works night?
still holdin on to those
CNY eve memories. yes.
so wat. they are fond ones
though it hurts me.
reminds me of my foolishness.
i guess, DAO DAI is the only song i can sing.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

duno y am i blogging when i got nothing to blog about.

sometimes i feel that we clicked.
we know what each other is thinkin about.
however, there's still distance
and gap in between us...

Thursday, May 12, 2005

Am soooo tired.

slpt at 4 plus last nite.
woke up at 8+ this morning
suppose to wake up at 8.
somehow, i din hear the alarm.

uncle came to pick mum and i up.
went over to pay respect to my late ah ma.
geez. how time flies. 49 days already.
still remember the day, 27th nov 2004...
Jay's concert. Jojo acc me to visit my grandma in the hospital
SICU. at level 3. and now...
51 more days to a hundred and we'll all be heading to
the cemetery.

left soon and met up jojo! after sooo long
(refer to above)
for a 4 hr plus long singing session.
why the plus? guess only we know.
haha. anywhere food's yummy at k lunch cineleisure.
after tat, went to snip my hair.......
long awaited day.
not too bad. satisfactory.
did it at a salon at far east.

went to bugis in the evening.
suppose to go airport wif kelvin.
but too bad. sudden changes.
so we went for dinner instead.

wat a long and tiring day...
i duno if i shld blog or not.

i'm now back to the downside of my life again.
had wonderful uphills for the past few wks.
wat to do,
ur's faithfully is forever naive.
somehow, it's not bothering me tat much.
perhaps, i've manage to relate my emotions to songs.
i no longer wan to dream.
even though my dream in my previous posts came true.
Read this: F-R-E-A-K-I-N-G C-A-M-E T-R-U-E
i jus tot...
lets jus leave it to fate again.

i met u 5 years back.
saw you few times during the past few yrs
even b4 we really got to know each other.
and now really know u from work.
ain't this call fate?

my same line: Let's jus see how it goes.

Saturday, May 07, 2005

well, haven been updating.
been busy working
tiring weeks for me...

me life is pretty much the same.
work and work.
school's starting soon... (why am i reminding myself?!?!)
it's been a mnth plus since my grandma passed away.
how time flies man...
all the ceremony and rituals only seems like yesterday.
i still get flashback of the whole thing.
can't help. wat to do...
it really affects me alot.

it's a sat. this is the first sat,
i haven gone singing for the past 3 wks.
and i'm missing it!
this officially shows that i'm addicted to singing.
yes yes.

my life hasn't been different from being single...
it feels exactly the same.
this is the first time i'm heading into a relationship
where i duno where it'll bring me to.
of coz, i hope for a happy ending like all fairytales.
who wouldn't? but then, lookin at how things goes,
i guess it'll be..... a very very low keyed one.
no nothing...
rumors at work place have been flyin ard.
i guessed it's no longer kept in the dark.
it's such a headache. but... still
i dun wana think about it.

jus hope that everything will go smoothly.
you're sick. very sick. i can see that.
i suppose it's the effect from your growin wisdom tooth
i had that too. so... pls take good care of yourself k.
miss you.

Thursday, April 28, 2005

as i allow myself to step into this relationship again,
i jus cross my fingers.

all i wan and ever wish for,
is jus simply,
for everything to go on well...

hopefully, it will not be like the past 2 times.

忘了有多久 再没听到你
我想了很久 我开始慌了
你哭着对我说 童话里都是骗人的
也许你不会懂 从你说爱我以后
你要相信 相信我们会像童话故事里

你哭着对我说 童话里都是骗人的
也许你不会懂 从你说爱我以后
我愿变成童话里 你爱的那个天使
你要相信 相信我们会像童话故事里

我要变成童话里 你爱的那个天使
你要相信 相信我们会像童话故事里

我会变成童话里 你爱的那个天使
你要相信 相信我们会像童话故事里


Thursday, April 21, 2005

told me to remember to miss u.

and yes, i did.

miss u loads. rather than jus miss u.


Thursday, April 14, 2005

I seriously duno wat to say.
this is the second time you're asking for a
if i were to agree, it will be the third time.

i guess i'm in a dilemma.
i should really ignore u first.
should i?
maybe i should jus let things take its course.
i dun wan to make any of such bgr decisions
at this point in time.

wat can i say now?

all i have in mind is stillmy beloved grandma.

Monday, April 11, 2005

i have had a very long day today.
i slpt at 4 plus near 5 am
and woke up early morning for hssband's syf.

this is the first time after so long,
my heart goes out to the band once again.

My dear band,
i know u guys aim high.
it's good to aim high for a gold.
but then like wat i've said.
it's not wat u get. it's how much effort that you've put in.
and who says maintaining a sliver is easy?
i am really so proud of u guys.
my batch only did a bronze.
this is the first time i see a band who gets a sliver and cried so hard.
everybody cried... it was... indeed a sad moment.
yes, we'll stand firm
you guys din fail. neither did u fall today.
work hard for the next syf... juniors.
gold does not come overnight.
hssband went back to comp only from my batch. 3 syfs.
you guys did ur best. great job.
love u all... it was great to see the band spirit and teamwork once again.
i miss my band days...

oh.. i went to buy 2 books today!
wow. haha.
haven been reading for long time. and that reminds me...
i must go buy 8 days tml.
i bought 'Asking for Trouble' by Jason hahn, a writer for 8 days.
and this very interesting book entitled..
He's Jus Not Into You...

Saturday, April 09, 2005

been quite sometime since i last blogged.
kinda abandon my blog.
it's not that i'm lazy to blog.
jus that i dun feel like.
there's nothing much for me to blog either.

my life's pretty much the same.
it's either work or home, slacking, bumming ard
playing sims 2.
oh yeah, it's hell lot of an addiction.

there's nothing much else to do...
actually there is.
pack up my bookshelf, head to the gym, arrange singing sessions...
blah blah...
did i mention b4 that i've found new interest in workin out in the gym?
well not much of working out.
jus sweating it out... make myself more alive?
oh... and i'm still hooked on to singing.
there's more things i can do.
jus that i can't seem to bring myself to do it.. lazy. ya. i know.
i've got nothing on today.
been ask to j0in movie.. but then, movie is not really my thing.
cept for the nachos. =X
i duno if i shld go or not.
or jus bum at home and
control my sims...

dun bother askin me if i'm feelin better...
coz, i will say ya. i am.
whether am i... this i do not know.
so dun bother askin.
now i feel like watching LOTR again... sheesh...

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

first and foremost,
thanks to everyone who care...
those who came down...

finally, it's over.
i mean, the 5 days long funeral.
back home from CCK cemetery.
the burial ritual.
it's indeed a very sad thing to come to accept the fact that
the one who took care of you,
watched you grew up,
taught you those things you ought to know,
jus left you. without a word.
i really do miss and love my grandma alot.
but things are not really over yet.
the 7th day ritual, 49th day ritual and 100th day ritual.
i'm dead beat.
four hours of slp for 5 days.
jus hope that i can energize myself by tml.
coz i got to work on thurs. and the 7th thingy as well.

Friday, March 25, 2005

jus as soon after i posted my previous post,
the phone rang.
non stop
i felt uncomfortable.
and there it is.
I was still missing her on my way home.
NEVER EVER will i see her again.
NEVER EVER will she hear me call her anymore.

You Have Good Karma

In general, you like to do the right thing when it comes to others.

Your caring personality really shines through.

Sure, you have your moments of weakness - and occasionally act out.

But, all in all, you're karma is good... even with those few dark spots.

Well, true or false, i dun know
jus for fun.
anyway, i think...
i'm goin to set myself free
be myself once more.
let go... and be free...

Thursday, March 24, 2005

You Are Somewhat Honest

You do tend to tell the truth a lot

But you also stretch the truth on occasion

You figure a little lie isn't a big deal

As long as it doesn't hurt anyone too much!

had one of the worst paper today
was writing rubbish throughout the whole damn paper
let's jus hope that i dun have to go back
to take supp paper.

after tat went to meet chris and her mr L for KBOX
wah... first time i sang Sooooo much.
i mean... really alot!! first time i open my voice in public!
basically got hooked onto singing!!!!!!!!
i wana go singing again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
anywayz, it did help me forget lots of things already.
so relaxed now.
tired also....

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Your Seduction Style: The Natural

You don't really try to seduce people... it just seems to happen.
Fun loving and free spirited, you bring out the inner child in people.
You are spontaneous, sincere, and unpretentious - a hard combo to find!
People drop their guard around you, and find themselves falling fast.

i have a thousand and one things to say today.
i am so moody now.
i received 2 missed calls this morning.
why do i always never hear my phone ring?
why do i always not feel the vibration?
why? why? why?
i yearn to know who called me.
one of the numbers actually looked so freaking familiar
seems like your home phone to me.
why did i not leave the room to call back before sitting down???
things often goes this way.
i tried callin back after my paper.
no one picked up.
i used to tell myself not to bother about missed calls
yes, often i don't. but this time round, i really can't help.
was out wif mama, ade, shan, wen and jean having lunch.
walked ard. but then the mind jus seems to stray off.
went in to K pool. saw the billard table.
OMG. it happened again. CNY eve is back.
i'm really lost.
right now, i have no mood for anyting.
not even my paper for tml.
i guess, i have to take a long break first. hopefully, make myself study at nite.
and brace the courage to find out who called me.

oh... it's your birthday today.
Happy birthday.

Monday, March 21, 2005

Its your birthday in about 20 mins time.
jus wana wish you happy birthday.
may your dreams come true.
enjoy yourself.
i'm sure you will...

You Are Bold And Brave

But daring? Not usually?

You tend to like to make calculated risks.

So while you may not be base jumping any time soon...

You are up for whatever's new and (a little) exciting!

Sunday, March 20, 2005

You Are A Loyal Sidekick

While you aren't the most visable one in your group...

You're always up for a good time or conversation

And you stick with your friends no matter what

You may feel underappreciated - but it only seems that way!

i dreamt of you last nite again.
you hoping for reunion.



You Are 50% Normal

(Somewhat Normal)

While some of your behavior is quite normal...

Other things you do are downright strange

You've got a little of your freak going on

But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself

went to work today.
changed shift wif chui yee for this wk.
your sis dropped by for a box of bacon and cheese
first thing she asked me was:
"are you still with my bro?"
me: "no." (trying to react cooly to it)
sis: "he broke up with you?"
me: "no... it was like... no contact and tat kind of stuff..." (trails off)
sis: "..." (aggitated expression)

after she left, i sorta lost my concentration in work for a while.
what does this means?
i guess, nobody else knows better than i do...
i'm not feeling too good about it.
esp when u turn up for cleaning today.
nagging about your coming bday.
i know... in less than a wk's time.
what can i say?
i jus wanna wish u happy birthday. that's all.

Friday, March 18, 2005

jus woke up... haha...
it's like 7pm now...
i woke up at 6 plus though.
had a long long day ytd.

went to work.
after work went down to Singapore Conference Hall
to watch the band's final round of rehersal for SYF
at the concert hall.
went back to sch with them and ended up staying overnite there.
did some silly stuff...
'slpt' along the corridor...
haha... it's cool... you watch the sky changes
and the wind's definitely chilly enough!
went home at 7?

reached home at around 8+
bathe, wash clothes, surf the net for a while...
surprisingly, i WASN'T slpy at all?!?!
till about 9.
made myself slp... and here i am posting this.
if i'm not wrong, mama, you did ask if i wana go back sch wif ya today rite?
erm... there's no call from you...
so i jus slpt tru the day lor....

Your Brain is 46.67% Female, 53.33% Male

Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female

You are both sensitive and savvy

Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed

But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

was watchin the 9pm show on channel 8.
something certainly sounds freaking familiar!
the sampan, boat, cruise, passenger thingy.
well... too bad, i din get copyright!
i originated it ok...
anyway, i have this discomfort in my right palm.
oh dear. i have no idea why is it so....
hope it doesn't affect my work tml.
i have had an extremely long day today.
slpt at 4 ytd.
was mugging MER. woke up at ard 11?
din have a gd slp from 8am onwards
coz was worrying about my darling sister, evelyn.
the band havin music exchange wif 15 other schs today.
it's like WOW. 15 schs! that's definitely a lot.
anyway, went for it. did nothin much though.
caught up wif my junior and the kids.... Opps.
haha. witnessed sumthing today.

i always tot guys after NS wld be matured enough to think for themselves and the consequences for the actions they take.
as expected, u were extremely K-PO. but you did went overboard
you shouldn't have used vulgarities on that boy.
c'mon. he's still a sec sch kid. practically, a BOY.
you, 21 this year, still wana take on a BOY???
Oh..... grow up pls... u make me feel so embarassed of hssband alumni.
watever it is, u did cause the trouble. hopefully it'll never ever happen again.

caught hitch wif kelvin.
i wld say, it's a funny show.
however, it does makes me wonder...
opportunities come by or were they created?
hahaha... go ahead catch it guys, it's quite nice.
am pretty tired now. but i still have to continue on where i had left off last nite
else, i wldn't be able to finish mugging!
oh, my parents jus left for taiwan today.
blame the exams! i can't go. shit.
i do miss my mum...

to something else now...
sometimes, i really do dread the thought of taking 147.
though it's kinda my fav bus, as i've been takin it for the past... 6 yrs?
it has been by trusted transport.
i take this bus to most places i go.
to sch back in those secondary days,
to town when i go city hall,
to clementi when i meet up wif the guys for pool,
and of course, to work.
why do i dread taking the bus?
coz, it bypasses that road.
whenever i see that road, the sch, the mrt, the muslim food stalls,
the factory at the other side,
images of you and that new year eve flashes back
almost immediately.
how am i suppose to forget?
i can't not take that bus. what can i do?
everytime, i see those landmarks, i get zapped back into the past.
help..... help......

Sunday, March 13, 2005

i... got something to say.
i know i got.
but i dun seem to remember.
how sad is that.

lets jus leave it.
... ... ... ... ...

Saturday, March 12, 2005

am so slpy.
duno why.
most prob due to the food i ate
and the fan that is constantly blowing at my eyes.

need to get down to study for MER.
vbus got so many shit to look at.
but me ain't got a proper table thanks to mum.
duno what's with the tray.
been left on the table for so long and she jus leave it as it is.
i need a table to write my notes as i copy from vbus!
this is irritating.
making me lose the motivation to study.
Grrr... i hate this.

RETURN ME MY TABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Wednesday, March 09, 2005

i guess, i've reach the step.
where i've chosen to let go.
at the crossroad.
it's either, or.
and i've chosen.
it does hurt a little now and then.
but, things will never be the same.
so no point holding on.
let's jus see what can time do for us.
or rather, ME.
it still hurts when i bypass bendemeer JTC,
listen to the song you sent, think of my fav song,
work, and many things else which has a connection with you.
i know have to and will be strong.
i know i can do it.
i'm tired of all these avoidance.
sorry to say, i find them childish.
i expect us to behave like adults, to be able to talk
too bad, you chose to avoid, a lose-lose situation.
nevermind, friends or not, it's up to you.
i'll still be the friend of your's who will always lend u a helping hand
in every aspect, when u need one.

i'm so tired btw.
woke up at 5+ today
went for the conference job.
damn tiring.
SIP is irritating. i dun know if i should go look for my own co.
the tot of going through that bloody interview like comm skills
is purely disturbing to me... argh....

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

nowadays, i enjoy the comfort to the maximum, surfing net at home
on my bed.
finally my wireless lan is done. but i hav to fix up my CPU for my desktop.
am glad i no longer have to stay in the living room late at nite.
had a great time chatting wif desmond last nite.
sure it was entertaining.
his 'live' concert at woodlands. haha.
we were having audio conference via msn.
quite fun though.

i know that holding on is a silly thing to do.
the mind says let go.
but the heart says hold on.
maybe there could jus be another chance.
but, that would also mean another chance for me
to let me get hurt by u again.
can't i jus forget? no. at least not at the moment.
was literally happy that u called the other day to ask me help you
collect your pay. tot you finally sorted things out.
guess, i was wrong.
you're still avoiding. always. as usual.
was shocked when u msn me.
simply jus to say thanks. and u logged off immediately.
not leaving time for me to say a welcome.
ain't that avoidance?
i do not know what more can i say.
lets jus leave time to do the work...
i am in no control.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Am so surprised you called.
simple call from u to ask me help u keep your pay first.
y me? i do not know.
but i do not mind.
can be a form of compliment too.
at least, i know,
you're not avoiding.

Thursday, March 03, 2005

urghz.. i'm freaking haunted!

haunted by those memories you left behind.
how it all started.
with your fake marriage proposal thingy.
up till the promise to visit the zoo and 'under-sea' world.
tat's wat u call the underwater world.
till the day it first ended.
the ktv nite, where things were goin back on.
the nite where u pester me to play online pool with you
to how it started the second time.
the way you sound wif the 'juz-woke-up' voice tru the phone
the river angbao trip during CNY eve.
those fireworks. those stuff u told me about.
the long walk from marina to beach road. the stop over at gateway.
the way you played billard. what you call bendemeer road in chinese.
the prata and mutabak we ate. the lift to your house.
the playground near your place, your friends.
the bottle of solution you bought. the way your sisters reacted when they saw me
early CNY morning.
right up till the movie, million dollar baby.
and till this very day.
even monday, when we were busy shifting those stuff out of shop.
those irritating noise u made. 'tuk-nai'

they are still haunting me... for the past few days!
how and when will i get out?
i guess, only time will tell... or when someone else steps in
and pull me out...

Sunday, February 27, 2005

i think i've been missing you or rather thinkin bout u too much.
till i even dreamt about u last nite.
about us.
BRrrrrr......... US? HUH-HUH?
it was a pretty nice dream though.
but then, in that dream, i was never happy
until we're together.
does that mean that, i will only be happy
with you?

they say, dreams are often the reverse.
i hope so. i so wana get on with my life.
stop dreaming about u.
but then again, sometimes, my dreams do freaking come true.
what now then???
somebody tell me how! pull me out of this pit i'm in!

Saturday, February 26, 2005

what are friends for?
i'm happy that i have my poly mates.
i have xp and gang...
and some others.

Who are your real friends?
i do not know.
thanks mama, for being there at times.
i'm freaking irritated at ppl nowadays.

i really do not know if they are my real friends or not
even after knowing each other for so many years.
perhaps... ppl change.
i've come to realise that you've change to become more selfish.
selfish, the right word? YES.
you only care about your own stuff.
was i being used all these while?
i tot so too.

i dun wan to think about it anymore.
you jus disappoint me ALOT.

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Alone in the project room now.

the following post will contain complicating extracts from my precious tots and views.
pls be warned. (^-^v)

i still miss you.

i know things will never be the same again.
history will never repeat itself once more.
coz i dun like to wait.
i hate to wait.

the person who is really worth your tears, will never make u cry...
it applies to waiting as well.
practically everything.
i'm fine. perfectly fine.
i'm ok with it. gotten over the sadness period.
jus that, i do miss you.
esp when i saw those fireworks pictures in my cam last nite.
shld i delete? was badly taken though.
but it's fond memories of CNY eve.
haiz. forget it. jus leave it there.
things are so different now. i jus wish, we could just be friends like b4.
perhaps, it shouldn't have even started in the first place.

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

i've been spending a bomb
on cab fares recently.
haven been slping enough.
really am very tired.

great thing is that.......
soon, those projects will be over soon!
but the comm skills summative test is stressing me out!
the big bomb from Ms Lynette Tay kills!
Tml, is presentation day.
for tourism.
Stressful too! i speed talk alot esp during presentations.
let's hope everything will be over soon...

sometimes, i still think of you.
but am trying hard enough to forget.
will keep those memories wif me.
thanks for those precious moments...

Saturday, February 19, 2005

Am so tired.
work up early today.
went to sch.

after that went town wif mama, ade, shan and jean.
window shop alot.
veri tired.
was in a daze.
saw the chingay parade.
reminds me of CNY eve countdown wif you.
all i can do is *sgHz*
memories... will always be memories.
i know,
the promised zoo trip, even if it's a promise,
i dun need u to fulfill it.
coz i know it'll be hard on both of us.
let's jus forget it.
i do not hate u.
i have the rights to. but i NEVER ever wanted to.

*t0 foRgve, is tO gvE up My RiGhtS t0 hAtE yOu foR hUrtNg Me...*

Friday, February 18, 2005

i feel so slpy.
duno y.
i slpt like a dead log in the bus on my way to work.

i spent a little too much today.
was suppose to go browse for blazor.
but ended up spending 95% of my cash at
spent 43 bucks there.
Bought this veri cool looking optical mouse.
50pcs CD-R
holder... etc.
now i can finally burn some stuff...
for goodness sake!

so tired now.. better go slp soon

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

know wat? i'm now typing this entry using my laptop.
the thing is that
my wireless connection is not done up yet...
i'm using some other ppl's!
my laptop manage to detect a few.
so... jus use! hahaha....
okie... lame i know.
but it feels cool man.

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Xing Hui Yi Leng.
i'm so sad.
think i'm goin to be numb soon.
i know i'm definately upset.
i dun even wan to took at you.
how bad can that be?

Duan Le Si Nian.
that's all i want.
jus hope that we'll go to the zoo on this coming sat
as promised.
and, have a enjoyable day.
nothing else. jus a happy memorable day.
i dun ask for anything else anymore.

tml is v day.
i can still remember, last yr's V. day.
the surprise with light heart-shaped candles.
lovely. but, nvm, it's the past.
time really flies.
i dun wan to think about tml.
all i wan to, is to concentrated on my work.
let the work carry my woes away...